CITY KID: In a sporadically published segment, our resident ex-raver describes the drug binges of his youth.

This happened back in the day when the kids didn’t exist and the party started on a Friday afternoon and went on until Sunday evening, every weekend.

When the only thing that really bothered you was how good the drugs were and where the next rave or house party was and who was driving and could you get lift.

Anyway, we were about 18 or 19 and weekends mainly consisted of getting stoned and taking speed or pills(ecstasy) or sometimes acid or shrooms but only on a few occasions. We’d either sit round mine playing on the decks, go off to a house party or a rave somewhere or just go on a completely random mission high on whatever we’d taken.


It new year’s eve and there was a rave/party/whatever on at an old farmhouse a few miles away and everyone went. A few of us got a taxi there and at some point after arriving, I’m on my way to the toilet and I pass one of my good mates, who I’d arrived with, he passes me a wrap of something, tells me it’s Ketamine and to go do a line.

Not even questioning what it was or how it might affect me, I took the wrap and went to the loo. I opened up the wrap to a white powder, which looked like speed to me and poured out a nice amount, enough so that if it was speed I would have been buzzing!

I go back downstairs and my mate is sat at the table in the kitchen making a joint so I join him and give him the wrap back and start to make a joint too….this is where is starts to get funky and I’m not sure on the timescale of anything…

We start to have a conversation about Ketamine and he tells me that you only need a little bit. I tell him I did a fat line and he just laughs and says when it wears off, try go to the dancefloor. He did and he got stuck to the wall.

I carry on making my joint, I remember putting the papers together and getting my tobacco out. Then my fingers and hands started to become not as responsive. I tried to open my tobacco pouch but I was unable to control my fingers, only slap my arm on the table. What the fuck!?!

I felt perfectly normal and clear headed, only I was becoming less and less able to control my arms. I went to stand up but was somehow stuck to the chair. I was unable to make my legs stand up only kick my feet out slightly while sat there. What the fuuuck!?

Someone came and sat down next to me and tried to start a conversation. I remember looking at her but not being able to properly speak, only make a noise. I remember the girl laughing at me, telling me that I was fucked and disappearing.



The whole time I was  perfectly clear headed and conscious just not able to respond or control my body in any way at all. What the fuck is going on, I kept thinking.

Then, while I was sat there trying to figure out what was going on, it was like  another one of me appeared just a few inches above my head, but I was the one above viewing me sat at the table. Then another one appeared, then another one, each time getting a few more inches above the head of the last one, and each time I was the one looking down…at me!

I stopped re-appearing above myself when I got to the ceiling and positioned myself in the corner of the room, with my head resting on the ceiling and my arms against a wall each. It was there that I could see myself sat at the kitchen table, looking like I was fucked out if my face.

I saw someone enter the room with a red cap on, they immediately pointed at the me that was at the table and began laughing at how fucked I was. How can he be pointing at me over there, when I’m up here. What the fuuuuck!?!

The room started to spin for ages getting faster and then all of a sudden I couldn’t see. It wasn’t black like my eyes were closed I don’t know how to explain but I just couldn’t see. Still the whole time I was perfectly clear headed and conscious inside my head!


I had a really strong urge that I needed to get ‘back’. I kept telling myself that I could do it and not to give up. I remember concentrating as hard as I could to try to get ‘back’, and then I remember slowly opening up my eyes. It was like I’d just woken up from a long sleep and my vision was blurry and out of focus, but trying to blink was impossible. Very slowly, my vision came back to normal.

I was still unable to control any of my body and was only able to shift the weight in my head side to side, but I could see, sort of. I still had this strong urge to get back, so sat there and focused on becoming more responsive until I could function.

I remember finding it funny how I could try to move my arm, but it just wouldn’t move.  I remember thinking  is this how it is for some disabled people, perfectly conscious and clear headed, perfectly able to hear and see just not able to respond because their body doesn’t work.

I could see that my tobacco pouch was still in front of me and one of my arms was on the table so I focussed on trying to make a roll up but was unable to feel the tobacco pouch, feel the rizla or even lick the rizla paper.

My face was there but I couldn’t feel it. I tried to stand up and was able to lift myself off the chair slightly but couldn’t yet stand. I could see my legs but couldn’t feel or control them either. All I could think about was ‘getting back’ so I sat there and gradually became more normal and able to control my body.



As I became more in control my only worry was thinking I was able to walk, taking a few steps, then falling over….But I’d had enough of being sat at the table and it was new year’s eve so slowly built up the courage to get up and go party.

I stood up and rested my arms on the table to help balance myself and pushed the chair back. I put one hand on the wall beside me and slowly dragged each leg away from the table. My legs felt like the heaviest things in the world but I wasn’t giving up.

The door was only a few steps away and I could balance between the table and wall until I got to the door. I remember people asking me if I was OK but I still couldn’t talk, only laugh, or what I thought was laughing and slowly shuffled to the door. I managed to get through the door and saw my mate who’d given me the Ketamine.

I tried to call him a cunt and he just laughed and grabbed my arm and led me to a seat somewhere, sat down and made a joint. At this point, the high seemed to be coming in waves that went along with the music. It was as though the bassline was affecting my ability to think and act.

When my mate passed me the joint I went to take a puff and missed my mouth and poked my eye.


Eventually and after some time I came back to normal, new year’s celebrations had long been and gone during my experience and I felt completely straight, not one bit high at all. I saw the person in the red cap, who’d pointed at me at the table when I was in the air, and we had a chat about how fucked I was before.

I found some more drugs, not Ketamine, and spent the rest of the night telling people about what had just happened to me!


3/10 – Wouldn’t try again!


Words by City Kid